[Debate] (Fwd) What financiers tell each other about life - Goldman gossip (not verified but funny)

Tue Jan 10 08:26:10 GMT 2012

Is this for real or did someone lock themselves in a broom closet with David Mamet?

On 09 Jan 2012, at 8:20 PM, Patrick Bond wrote:

> https://twitter.com/gselevator
> 
> GS Elevator Gossip
> 
> @GSElevator New York / London / Hong Kong
> Things heard in the Goldman Sachs elevators do not stay in the Goldman 
> Sachs elevators. Email what you hear to elevatorgoldman at gmail.com
> 
> 
> [classic] #1: Riding the subway reminds me why I am pro-choice.
> 23 hours ago
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Europe is starting to make African leaders look competent.
> 21 hours ago
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> Skirt #1: I love it when a guy hits on me & then gives me a business 
> card with a gmail account. Asshole, I work at Goldman Sachs.
> 23 hours ago
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I don't care about the fucking money, but green tea at Starbucks is 
> a fucking ripoff.
> 6 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Bank of America is the Kmart of banks. #2: Kmart sucks. #1: Thanks, 
> Rain Man.
> 6 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: The 40% of Obama voters who don't have jobs aren't getting out of 
> their beanbags to vote this time around.
> 6 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Under Bush, 5% unemployment was a disaster. Under Obama 8.5% is a 
> boom. #2: Affirmative action.
> 6 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: The British have had multi-family homes for decades. #2: The British 
> have been embracing mediocrity since 1945.
> 6 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: The fact that most people are too stupid to know how dumb they 
> really are is the fabric holding our society together.
> 6 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> [Talking implants] #1: Thinking about it. My GF wants them, and actually 
> thinks they're a present for her. #2: (laughs) Ask Matt Defusco.
> 5 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> A#1: Hey asshole, which one of the P90X steps is it where you have to 
> tell everyone in the fucking office that you're doing it?
> 5 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Romney's the type of consultant asshole who uses chopsticks at the 
> table even when the Chinese people are using forks.
> 5 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> MD#1: Markets go up... Markets go down... We always make money.
> 5 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: 2012 is all about girls born during the Clinton administration.
> 5 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: The difference between us and everybody else is that, even in a bad 
> year, we still make the playoffs.
> 5 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> ED#1 (to 1st year analysts): If I ever hear about something I say 
> mentioned on Twitter, I'll fucking kill you.
> 4 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Nothing says 'I was a filthy whore last year' like 'I'm giving up 
> hard alcohol in 2012.' #2: My girlfriend gave up hard alcohol.
> 4 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: FIFO / LIFO season re-starts right after comp… First In, First Out… 
> Or, Last in, Fuck Off.
> 4 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1. Marching orders for the media in 2012, 'everything is a sign of a 
> recovery.'
> 4 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Rick Santorum looks like he enjoys jerking off in vacant Sunday 
> school classrooms.
> 4 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> Suit #1: A new year. Time for a new slampiece.
> 4 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: In 2011, Chinese bought more Lambos & Rolls-Royces than anyone else. 
> #2: Social unrest is coming. 900 million have-nots w/ pitchforks.
> 3 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Only 55% of Americans between the ages of 16-29 have jobs. #2: Fuck 
> them. They got that ass clown elected in the first place.
> 3 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I like to ask candidates what song they'd walk out to before a 
> heavyweight title fight. #2: Easy. Ruff Ryders Anthem.
> 3 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> MD#1: Handshakes and tie knots. I don't have time for someone that can't 
> master those basic skills.
> 2 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Skinny jeans and a fur coat. Looks sexy as hell, but reeks of 
> high-maintenance. #2: High-maintenance is sexy.
> 2 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: The white board in the conference room looks likes Fermat's Last 
> Theorem. #2: Erase it just in case it was the janitor.
> 2 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Hey fat fuck, I already know what your resolution is.
> 2 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Whenever I see a black guy with my last name, I can't help but 
> wonder if my family used to own his.
> 2 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I measure how hammered I am by my ability to recite every line from 
> 'Caddyshack.'
> 2 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> MD#1: If you're not dead to at least 1 person, you're not living right.
> 1 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Why do people wear wool if they know cashmere exists?
> 1 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: There is actually no such thing as turtleneck weather.
> 1 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> Signing off for 2011: Remember, right now, someone somewhere is probably 
> having a hot iron rod jammed up their ass. Life could be worse.
> 1 Jan
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: 2012 is going to make 2011 feel like 2007. #NoahBuiltTheArkBeforeTheRain
> 31 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: 2 weeks of family time. I'm ready for a FBT to let some bad out. #2: 
> FBT? #1: Fake Business Trip.
> 31 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: This meeting's gonna suck. I'd rather watch the Kardashians play 
> Scrabble. #2: Actually, that sounds awesome.
> 31 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Rick Perry has single-handedly proven Darwin wrong. #2: And he would 
> take that as a compliment.
> 31 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> Wow. Thx! RT @Oprah Our award for Best Twitter Account of 2011 goes to 
> @GSElevator - refreshing, intelligent, funny, & insightful.
> 31 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I'm gonna open a gym that turns into a bar after January.
> 30 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Wearing a Rolex is like driving an Audi. It says you've got money, 
> but nothing to say.
> 30 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: When it doesn't matter how much the drinks cost, it's always happy hour.
> 30 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: She's only about 3 weeks of anorexia away from looking hot. #2: Maybe 4.
> 29 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> 1: Look thru her passport. You can usually tell if the relationship is 
> worth pursuing. (Laughs) 3 stamps, and they all say 'Cancun.'
> 29 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> A#1: Think about how much higher unemployment stats would be if so many 
> black guys didn't call themselves 'entrepreneurs.'
> 29 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Mission Impossible 4 is the coolest commercial I've ever seen.
> 29 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I'm a regular at 4 different Nobu's. #2: 2002 me would have been 
> impressed.
> 29 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Obama is aging fast enough for Morgan Freeman to play him in a movie.
> 28 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: What's the most shocking thing a German tourist can say to a hooker… 
> 'Can I pay in Euros?"
> 28 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Money might not buy happiness, but I'll take my fucking chances.
> 28 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Groupon… Food stamps for the middle class.
> 28 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Everything points to things getting worse in 2012. We need to be 
> pragmatic about what in our pipeline is executable. #ShittingBRICs
> 28 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: What he lacks in social skills, he makes up in wallet.
> 28 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: You're tired of being an analyst? Get over it. Every great porn star 
> had to do a gay scene once or twice just to move up.
> 28 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Obama's gone golfing 90 times in less than 3 years as president. 
> That’s about three months of golf.
> 28 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I've hated everyone I've ever met who owns a Prius.
> 27 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I can't wait until next week is this week, and this week is last 
> week. And then this year will be last year.
> 27 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> Skirt #1: I can always tell a banker within the first 2 minutes of 
> meeting him in a bar... because he tells me.
> 27 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> WINNER: The Best Christmas Card of 2011 pic.twitter.com/rWeAj6AG
> 27 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Told my wife her presents get deferred over 5yrs w/ a clawback if 
> she doesn't behave. And she loses them all if she walks away.
> 26 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Almost time for children to learn a valuable life lesson. Santa 
> loves rich kids more.
> 25 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Drake is the Rachael Ray of rap music.
> 25 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: IQ tests don't mean shit. #2: That's just something stupid people say.
> 25 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Cigars, watches, wine. I understand that. But Air Jordans? #2: Those 
> people are shoe connoisseurs.
> 24 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: This Christmas, I went to Jared... He works at the Graff on Madison.
> 24 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Double-breasted, peak-lapel suits look retarded. #2: I have a 
> one-button peak-lapel suit for going out. #1: Nah, thats dope.
> 24 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: That fuckstick is qualified to be an MD in the same way that The 
> Olive Garden is qualified to be Italian food.
> 24 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: By now, protesters just look like pigeons to me.
> 24 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> [3PM Friday] #1: I need at least a few fucking drinks. It's 'Love 
> Actually' night.
> 24 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: $1,000. I had Andy Rooney, and Amy Winehouse, and Steve Jobs. #2: 
> That's awesome.
> 24 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1 (on physical gold): If you don't have it, you don't own it.
> 23 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> [classic] #1: Hermes ties are like Jordans for white people.
> 23 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Fact. Nearly 50% of all American workers have less than $10k saved 
> for retirement. #2: Fuck. That wouldn't cover a ski weekend.
> 23 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: My wife is basically Pay-Per-View.
> 23 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Anyone that puts CFA and MBA on their business card is a cunt.
> 22 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: My fiancé wants to make the NYTimes wedding section. #2: Christ, 
> that's vulgar.
> 22 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Don't bitch about your apartment. If you want a gated house on a 
> golf course, go be some dogshit CFO in Cleveland.
> 22 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I'm going Roethlisbergering tonight.
> 22 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Scumbag Jimmy Carter sent condolences to North Korea. #2: Obama 
> sends his regrets that he never got the chance to bow to KJI.
> 22 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Either Facebook sucks, or my friends suck.
> 22 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I started winning the day I was conceived.
> 21 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Ronald Reagan always spent Christmas in DC so more Secret Servicemen 
> could spend it with their families. #aloha
> 21 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I asked him what his life goal is, and he said 'to make the obituary 
> in The Economist.' #2: Great answer. #hired
> 21 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I'm sure that Kim Jong Un is sorely missed by the Xbox community by now.
> 21 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I love watching Asian guys smell and swirl their wine obnoxiously. 
> And then their faces get all blotchy. Pussies.
> 21 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I'm rich, but not give-up-my-US-passport rich… Yet.
> 21 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I help with the recruiting effort, or as I call it, the Office 
> Beautification Project.
> 20 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: If people never trust a skinny chef, they shouldn't want their 
> bankers to be poor.
> 20 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I'd never get away with giving my wife something for Christmas that 
> I'm supposed to give her anyway. #SorryLexus
> 20 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> [classic] #1: I wish I invested in poverty. It's up 60% since 2001. #2: 
> We did.
> 20 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: It's definitely remote-control helicopter week in the office.
> 19 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: From my experience, most people really should have lower self-esteem.
> 19 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: 1 in 7 Americans has at least 10 credit cards. #2: Fucking morons.
> 19 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Ryan Gosling would play me in a movie.
> 19 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: It feels like it did in '07, but w/ more political uncertainty, and 
> a cracking BRIC. #2: And the Fed's out of bullets.
> 18 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> [Trading Floor] #1: Hey. When you get head, do you put your hands on the 
> dumpster or on the homeless guy's shoulders?
> 18 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: What's the difference between John Paulson and Father Christmas? #2: 
> What? #1: Some people still believe in Father Christmas.
> 18 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Call me an optimist, but I manscape every Thursday.
> 17 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Met her parents for the first time. Have to put her long-term rating 
> on review for downgrade. #JamieLeeCurtisGenes
> 17 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: There was a time when people would save up for things they wanted to 
> buy.
> 17 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: 'Whom.' It's 'with whom.' Not 'who.' #2: Suck it.
> 17 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: My charity work begins & ends with black tie galas. And if drunk me 
> is the highest bidder on a signed Springsteen guitar, so be it.
> 17 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I don't see any midgets out there protesting any more. I guess they 
> all got seasonal jobs.
> 16 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: His CV showed him going from MD at Bear Stearns to Director at 
> JPMorgan. He's like the Benjamin Button of finance.
> 16 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Fuck that. When I was an analyst, I had to eat an entire 'wasabi 
> roll'. What we called team-building, you faggots call bullying.
> 16 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Listerine breath strips. That's like sizzurp for white people.
> 16 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Bribery, corruption… It's the cost of doing business in emerging 
> markets. As Mao said, 'no fish can live in pure water.'
> 16 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Dude, she's the piñata of Christmas parties. Always gets smashed, 
> and anyone can hit it.
> 15 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Chris Farley would have been an awesome Barney Frank. #2: But an 
> even better Khloe Kardashian.
> 15 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: FYI… Every time one of you says 'epic', all I hear is 'fucking stupid'
> 15 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: My biggest New Years resolution... To not change a fucking thing.
> 15 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: On our anniversary, I send my wife flowers with a Congratulations card.
> 15 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: She wants the person I am 10% of the time, 100% of the time. #2: 
> That's you not being you. #EndIt
> 15 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Sending flowers to her office is like a big neon sign to her 
> coworkers saying, "The asshole screwed up again."
> 14 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: My only inter-racial experience was with a black sock. Once.
> 14 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I always take chicks to sushi on a first date. Sake is like a legal 
> ruffie.
> 14 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: We should elect Radio Shack's CEO as President. Only a miracle 
> worker can keep a shitty battery store in business for 30 years.
> 14 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: If you want a friend, get a dog. If you want a friend with benefits, 
> find some chick who's in PR.
> 13 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: In New York, don't trust a banker with a pocket square. In London, 
> it's a pinky ring... And in Asia, don't fucking trust anyone.
> 13 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> A#1: I need a buddy system for December; someone to make sure I get 
> home, wake me up on time, and then tell me what happened.
> 13 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> MD#1: Every horrible wife starts out as an adorable girlfriend.
> 13 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: A chick I banged once and haven't seen since just added me on 
> LinkedIn. #2: She wants you to give her 'the business' again.
> 12 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> MD #1: We better win some FinanceAsia awards. PMD #1: Fuck them. They 
> hate us.
> 12 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I don't care how hot she is, dumb is not sexy.
> 12 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: The only reason I do yoga is so I can meet girls. #2: I just tell 
> chicks I do yoga.
> 11 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> [classic] #1: My garbage disposal eats better than 98% of the world.
> 11 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I never give money to homeless people. I can't reward failure in 
> good conscience.
> 10 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: He's got 1,800 Facebook friends, and can't get 40 people to go to 
> his wedding.
> 10 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.
> 10 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> [Classic] #1: My last meal? I want to go out like I fucking came in. 
> Breastfed.
> 10 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Swinging by Tiffany's to buy a gift. #2 (looks cynically): Why don't 
> you get her something nice?
> 9 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Not wearing a watch is the new Patek.
> 9 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Europe is one big gordian knot. #2: What's that? #1: How'd you get 
> this job?
> 9 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: There's no such thing as a hopeless situation, just hopeless people 
> in situations.
> 9 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> MD#1: This cover-your-ass-and-escalate-all-decisions ethos is bullshit. 
> It never used to be like this. #ABACUS
> 9 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: If I were single and always sober, I wouldn't need to password lock 
> my iPhone.
> 9 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Getting rich isn't that hard. Any hot girl with questionable morals 
> can do it.
> 8 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> A#1: I'm planning a night I won't remember.
> 8 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Being a Republican voter is like being a mid-30s chick, you'll just 
> have to settle. And you've probably had better.
> 8 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Can we please stop calling them 'hipsters' and go back to calling 
> them 'pussies?'
> 8 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: My wife thinks alcoholism is totally acceptable as long as she calls 
> it 'brunch' and does yoga first.
> 7 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I bet the 1st time John Paulson had sex, he was awesome. Then a huge 
> disappointment ever since. #2: Yeah, I'm in his merger arb fund.
> 7 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: My liver must look like Oprah without makeup.
> 7 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I sent a Happy Pearl Harbor Day message to a few guys in Tokyo. Told 
> them I expect a Congratulations back on August 6th & 9th.
> 7 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Flying squirrels must get all the squirrel pussy. Think about that, 
> hotshot.
> 7 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I just typed a long e-mail out on my Blackberry while sitting in 
> front of my computer. Time for a Starbucks run.
> 7 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Equity markets have plenty of good news priced in. Rates have plenty 
> of fear built in… And one of them is wrong.
> 7 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Seriously… that idiot hedging an oddlot position with futures is 
> like a fat chick buying a rape whistle. #verbatim
> 7 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: How'd you get your nails like that? Shiny, but not too shiny. #2: I 
> get them buffed twice. And no enamel, too over-the-top for a guy.
> 6 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I actually like watching CNBC. It's as if The Wall Street Journal 
> got fucked by ESPN2.
> 6 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: I saw John Voight last night. #2: The dentist?
> 6 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> [classic] #1: The Euro is dead. They're just bickering over who pays for 
> the funeral.
> 6 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1 (on the long term potential of new girlfriend): Good school. Good 
> family. Good genes. Probably breeding material.
> 6 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Seeing Jerry Seinfeld tonight at Lincoln Center. #2: I'd be jealous 
> if it was 1996.
> 6 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> Skirt#1: I have a Birkin bag, but I think it's totally inappropriate for 
> client meetings.
> 5 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: If you don't know who Lew Glucksman was, you don't belong on the 
> trading floor. #2: You don't belong on Wall Street.
> 5 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: Dude, you can't call someone Corky.
> 5 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: It's a make-or-break week for Europe. #2: They say that every 
> week...The EU has more rescue plans than Obama has vacation days.
> 5 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: The biggest problem that most people have with Christmas is that 
> they're poor.
> 5 Dec
> GS Elevator Gossip
> GSElevator GS Elevator Gossip
> #1: A red pen on the trading floor used to get an analyst shit-canned. 
> #2: Still would, if caught by the right person. #1: Old school.
> 5 Dec
> Stay in touch with GS Elevator Gossip
> Join Twitter right now:
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> Email
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> 
> 
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