[DEBATE] : rape and common law marriages

[Charlene Smith]

Common law marriages are recognised in law in South Africa - I thought you 
were a lawyer?  If a couple whether straight or gay co-exist for a period of 
time (no period has been defined) they may:  adopt children, leave their 
estate to each other; have the other included on their pension scheme as a 
beneficiary in the event of their death; include their partner on their 
medical aid; etc... This has been confirmed by all the courts of the land 
and operates in practice.
The most common forms of rape are those where the women/child/man 'knows' 
the person, in my experience date rape and especially incest are by far the 
most common types of rape and those that cause the deepest confusion and 
lingering trauma.
**"Reciprocal legal obligations" is a euphimism to force boyfriends to 
legally support their girlfriends.**  And the problem with this is?  The 
same happens in the event of women supporting men, I have two friends who 
are by far and away the primary breadwinners, but they love their partners - 
are all relationships to become a factor of weight?  How much each does? 
How much each contributes?  Does love and respect and sharing not exist in 
your world?
It is so outrageous that you wrote this, that among all the other truly 
insensitive postings this falls into a category of its own, thank heavens 
this list is closed because I cannot begin to imagine the ridicule this 
comment would get: ***Wolf-whistling is not sexist (just inappropriate and 
to be discouraged in certain circumstances), and no amount of politically 
correct propaganda can change this, and there is no need to deal with it 
through the agency of criminal law or dismissal procedures at work. 
Construction workers in a lorry do no harm to anyone when they whistle at a 
beautiful woman.***   As a woman who has experienced this, I cannot tell you 
how it angers me.  It is profoundly sexist and certainly falls under the 
ambit of sexual harassment, which as a "lawyer" one would have hoped you 
would have known.

CS


---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: *Peter Mahlangu* <tshankimahlangu at yahoo.com>
Date: May 10, 2006 5:57 PM
Subject: [DEBATE] : Re: Proposed code for listings
To: debate at lists.kabissa.org

Just to clarify my position, which has been deliberately twisted and taken
out of contest by Alan to buttress his position about my imagined sexism:

On date rape, it is conceivable that the woman might have consented to sex.
Contrasted with so-called stranger rape, it is inconceivable that a woman
who is attacked in a dark alley or in her house by burglars or robbers can
consent to sex. In the latter case, rape has been committed. No questions
asked. The same cannot be said of date rape rape, that's why I take it with
a pinch of salt. This is not sexit, it's self-evident.

So-called common law marriages are a creation of the media, and are no
marriages at all. SA law recognises only civil marriages or those in terms
of African customary law, hindu or muslim law. Rape is about sex, just as 
hijacking is about greed or the morally
reprehensible desire for quick, tainted moeny. The fact that violence is
used to achieve the objective does not change this, even if the violence is
disproportionate to the resistance or the need to subjugate the victim.




On 5/10/06, Peter Mahlangu <tshankimahlangu at yahoo.com> wrote:
>
> I want to stop posts on the emotional subject of rape
> forever. I hope this is my last:


So do I



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