[DEBATE] : Re: It's okay to beat girls

[Charlene Smith]

Hear, hear!!!

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Peter Mahlangu" <tshankimahlangu at yahoo.com>
To: <debate at lists.kabissa.org>
Sent: Tuesday, April 11, 2006 12:08 PM
Subject: [DEBATE] : Re: It's okay to beat girls


As parents, we must also stop beating children
whenever they misbehave, because this is where they
learn that violence can correct misbehavior.

--- kuthaka hanne <zeldapam at yahoo.com> wrote:

> this is very worrying; i believe that it is us
> parents who have failed to turn around the attitude
> of the future generation in regard to these matters.
> parents of young boy children have shown them that
> it is okay to disrespect and devalue girls and
> parents of young girls have shown them that it is
> okay to take beatings and abuse from men. what we do
> in our lives has a great impact on our children and
> so long as we women continue to 'take' all the
> battering from our men, our children will take it as
> normal. being a mother of three daughters in a
> patriarchal society, i have had to take the
> initiative to correct these misconceptions, each and
> every day by what i say and do. let us all do the
> same.
>   ann kithaka, kenya
>
> Peter Mahlangu <tshankimahlangu at yahoo.com> wrote:
>   The issue of violence in relationships is very
> troubling. And I would suggest some girls also hold
> the disturbing views mentioned in the article. A
> friend of mine was once dumped by a two-timing
> girlfriend. When I asked her why, she said her other
> boyfriend beats her when she makes "mistakes",
> which,
> according to her, meant he loved her. My friend,
> according to this logic, did not beat her when she
> misbehaved, and thus did not love her. I was
> shocked.
>
> --- Charlene Smith wrote:
>
> >
> > More news at www.news24.com
> > Read the story online:
> >
> >
>
http://www.news24.com/News24/South_Africa/News/0,,2-7-1442_1911699,00.html
> >
> > 'It's okay to beat girls'
> >
> > Apr 06 2006 08:23:35:707AM
> >
> >
> > Nivashni Nair
> >
> > KwaZulu-Natal schoolboys believe it is
> > acceptable to beat their partners to "keep them in
> > line", a study has found.
> >
> > Pietermaritzburg - A recent study indicates
> > that KwaZulu-Natal schoolboys believe it is
> > acceptable to beat their partners to "keep them in
> > line".
> >
> > Delegates shook their heads in disbelief at
> > some of the responses from the young participants,
> > when the survey, conducted in three schools in the
> > south of the province, was presented at the Eighth
> > World Conference on Injury Prevention and Safety
> > Promotion on Wednesday.
> >
> > Reshma Sathiparsad of the University of
> > KwaZulu-Natal told delegates most of the
> > participants believed it is acceptable to beat
> their
> > girlfriends or female partners.
> >
> > One young man said beating a girl would mean
> > there were "slim chances of her misbehaving" while
> > another said hitting a girl meant you loved her
> > because if you didn't you wouldn't bother to do
> so.
> >
> > Sex equals love
> >
> > Sathiparsad's study also found that sex was
> > the central part of most of these relationships.
> > Most of the participants felt that sex equals love
> > and when told by the facilitator that there is
> > nothing wrong with waiting to have sex at an older
> > age, most laughed loudly.
> >
> > Sathiparsad found that most of the
> > participants believed there is nothing wrong with
> > "forced sex" in a marriage.
> >
> > "When we married, I can force you to have sex
> > with me because I know that I pay my money to buy
> > you. I paid my thousands," one participant said,
> > laughing.
> >
> > Infidelity acceptable
> >
> > The participants also saw nothing wrong with
> > infidelity. The youngsters believed that if a man
> > wants sex, he could have it, even if it's not with
> > his wife.
> >
> > Sathiparsad said the study showed young South
> > African men are "contesting violent
> masculinities".
> >
> > She recommended that further education be
> > implemented to make young men aware of women's
> > rights as well as respect in a relationship.
> >
> >
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> >
>
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