[DEBATE] : Zulu culture according to Zuma!!!

[Charlene Smith]

'Zuma: She had knees'2006-04-06 08:19:01http://www.news24.com/Images/Photos/20060405163201G-string.jpghttp://www.news24.com/Images/Photos/20060405140116col_chrisroper_grey.gifApparently, as a woman, it's easier than ever to implicity ask for sex. Just wear a knee-length skirt, writes Chris Roper. 
Chris Roper 

Well, these are happy days indeed. Apparently, as a woman, it's easier than ever before to implicitly ask for a good rogering. It used to be you'd have to show a bit of cleavage, and wear a really short skirt. Now, if the testimony of our beloved ex-deputy president is anything to go by, a medium length skirt will do the trick. 

In fact, women all over South Africa will be pleased to hear that it's even better than this - wearing any skirt AT ALL will signify that you're begging for sex. 

According to my trusty News24 site, in his testimony at what the white-owned Mbeki-controlled media still insists on calling a "rape" trial, "Zuma said the woman had never visited him wearing a skirt before. On the night of the alleged rape, she had arrived wearing a knee-length skirt. 'When she came to me in a skirt... well, it told me something,' he said." 

'Knee actually means ja' 

I wonder what it told him? "Ooh, look, she's got KNEES, the trollop! I never knew that before. Knees, Gromit! I'll have me some of that." As most South African men will tell you, if a woman says 'knee', she actually means 'ja'. (I'd better explain to overseas readers that 'knee' is a pun on the Afrikaans word for no. I assure you, it is funny if you're a South African.) 

I'm being a little unfair on the ex-dep pres, perhaps. If what he tells us is true (and I'm sure it is, why would he lie, it's not as if he's a corrupt politician or anything like that), his alleged victim did send out an unmistakable signal of sexual interest by crossing her legs. 

Crossing her legs... wait a minute... that can't be right? I'm a little confused here. Is crossing your legs a sign of sexual interest? I thought opening them was? Ah well, perhaps it's cultural. You can get away with so much by using the c-word. 

I am sympathetic to other cultures, I really am, but I should just point out that in my culture it was traditional to think of black people as inferior and vaguely smelly, and we've managed to get over that pretty well. Is it too much to ask that cultures (and I include my culture in this) get over the apparently entrenched idea that women with knees are asking for sex? 

The more I write the word culture, the more I realise it has no meaning whatsoever. Consider this quote from Zuma, describing what happened after he wound up in bed with the alleged victim. "She said, 'you can't just leave a woman if she is ready'. And I said to myself that I knew as we grew up in the Zulu culture that you didn't just leave a woman in that situation. Because, if you did, then she will even have you arrested and say that you are a rapist." 

If that's part of the Zulu culture, well, thank goodness it's at the end of the alphabet. I can't wait to see what the verdict is going to be. I'm sure it's going to be creative. 

The last great South African verdict is last week's case of Sam Sibiya, who was given a more lenient sentence for raping a 14-year-old girl because social workers in Nelspruit said she hadn't been traumatised by the ordeal. 

Apparently, the victim is developmentally disabled, and has the mind of a two-year-old child. Hmm. Shouldn't you be given an extra harsh sentence for raping a two-year-old child? 

But fear not, Sam didn't exactly get away with it. He also raped a seven-year-old girl, who was severely traumatised, and he received a life sentence for that. Still, justice is a funny old game, as Trevor Quirk used to say about cricket. Let's see how creative the judicial system is going to be about Jacob Zuma. 

·  Chris Roper is part of the white-owned, Mbeki-controlled media. Remember girls, just say no to g-strings. 

·  Send your comments to Chris. 

·  See Chris's previous columns in his blog The World 

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